She Loves Me. She Really, Really Loves Me.

For Ivy.

Yes, she does.
From the heavens above,
To the width of the world,
She loves you.
She's never had a best friend like you.
You're different, she says.
You're like the flowers that bloom
To face the world once more.
She adores that about you.
She adores the strength that you possess.
We're the perfect match to take on the world.
We're Partners in Crime.
Our opposites attract in personality.
She likes that about us, she says.
I think she's jealous.
But who cares?
We're the One for each other, am I bluffing?
Screw those who say that we can't be together,
Because that's what's best friends are for:
We stick up for each other and give each other advice.
We're each others' bitch and pimp.
I love you, you love her.
That's how best friends are.
We take care of each other,
no matter how far we are from each other.
We hold hands so that we won't fall behind.
We slap each other so that we know we've done something wrong.
That's who you are-
The perfect best friend.
And it's true:
She loves you, indeed.
She really, really loves you.
And don't forget that.
Cause even God knows that,
Even if humanity doesn't possess that knowledge.
And one day, when we're old,
We'll sit on a bench and reminisce of our younger days.
Cause that's what best friends are for:
We never forget each other.

Ya Habibi Behebak (My Love, I Love You)

Habibi...Habibi...

(My Love...my love...)

Hayete...enta hayeti. 

(My life...you are my life.)

Ya, habib alby. 

(Oh, love of my heart.)

Enta habib alby w hayati, ya habibi. 

(You are the love of my heart and my life, my love.)

Al wakt min dhihab!

(Time is gold!)

Hal tou hebbouni, ya habibi?

(Do you love me, my love?)

Albi...Albi!

(My heart...my heart!)

Ya...habibi,

(My...love,)

Youni enta...

(You are my eyes...)

Ana ataajok, ya habibi!

(I need you, my love!)

Albi...Albi...

(My heart...my heart...)

Ya, ana motayyama! Ya, habibi!

(Oh, I'm in love! My love!)

Habibi...Habibi...Habibi...

(My love...my love...my love...)

Eshtaktoulaka.

(I miss you.)

Abadan laa tansynii.

(Don't ever forget about me.)

...Ahlam sa'ida, ya habibi

(...Sweet dreams, my love.)

 

 

For the Girl I Met in Junior High School

I once met a girl,

Who I thought would never be my best friend...

Perhaps my one and only.

She had an attitude when I first saw her.

I didn't bother to say that I already had a crush on her.

Dirty blond hair and hazel eyes.

Cute little voice and a hardcore body.

Soft skin and a sexy laugh.

I never knew she'd be love at first sight.

She's got a stone heart and a baby face.

Sexy dimples and warm skin.

When we hugged, I knew from then on 

That I needed her more than ever.

Won't say her name, she's too sacred to me.

Won't tell you who she is, you might take her from me.

Though, some people just can't shut up.

Someone took her and left me alone.

She never spoke to me for some time.

She left me alone and unwillingly to cry.

I wanted her...I needed her...

But I just didn't have her.

No one I'd met was like her.

She was different and loving...

No one was like that.

No one.

I always think about her.

I always dream about her.

Except that time I had a nightmare,

That I was chased by a giant broccoli.

But you wouldn't believe that, now would you?

Why? It was Love at First Sight.

Fat People

Here's a song I wrote...

It goes like this...

Corn dogs, hot dogs,

Twinkies, honey buns.

Cheese burgers, chicken fingers,

Donuts and cracker crumbs.

Spaghetti slash mac and cheese,

Tacos with some pizza.

Fettuccine, hot pockets,

Chicken with some rice and beans.

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! Food time!

Fat People! Hell yeah!

Pancakes, sausages,

Turkey wings and pretzels.

Hash browns, scrambled eggs,

Bacon with some waffles.

Chicken patties, pork chops,

French fries, burritos.

Peanut butter, Jelly,

Mash potatoes and Doritos.

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! Food time!

Fat People! Hell Yeah!

Popcorn and turkey spam,

Grilled cheese and cold cuts.

Beef Patties, Lucky Charms,

Shrimp Lo Mein and pork butt.

Chocolate cake and cheese cake,

Boston Creme Rolls and cookies.

Cinnamon buns and Cheese Nips,

Zebra Cakes and Pork and Beans.

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! Food time!

Fat People! Hell yeah!

Fat People! Yeah!

Fat People! I love you!

Fat People! Food time!

Fat People! Hell Yeah!

Fat People!!!

Dear Friend

Dear Friend,

I want you to know,

That I've met someone special today.

I met someone unlike you.

Someone more wilder and fun,

To hang out with.

Dear Friend,

That someone is nobody.

She's a good friend, I have to say.

Like you, she listens to me.

But, unlike you, She doesn't tell anyone.

She's very secretive,

Because she goes through the exact same thing.

Dear Friend,

You're a lot different, see.

You don't go through the things I do.

All you do is weep and whine about your nails.

You say your boyfriend broke up with you,

And when I try to work with you,

You ignore me and say I don't know.

Dear Friend,

You betray my trust when I believed you.

But some things I say aren't true.

Some things I say aren't my life.

Nobody is like that.

She keeps all the secrets I tell her.

Dear Friend,

Technically, I met this person before you.

I met this person a long time ago.

Before you existed in my life.

She sat by me when I was sick,

And introduced herself when I ask who she was.

Dear Friend,

I told her about you.

And what I felt about you.

And she said that we're all different.

We can all be friends but we can never trust each other.

I told her that I can open up to friendships right away,

And that I never really watch my step.

Dear Friend,

You've ignored me for some time.

And I figured it was time to tell you this.

I am no longer your friend.

I will no longer hang out with you.

Dear Friend,

You can argue with me all you'd like.

But I'd like you to know that I have a new friend.

And that friend is nobody.

Nobody is, I have to say, a better friend than you, friend.

Sincerely yours,

Me.