Daddy, Daddy...Hear Me Out

My dad showed me the message you sent him, 

I understand what you're saying
and I understand what my dad is saying also 

Yes. I refer to him as my dad, yes.

Orlando was my hero when I was little

And I kept that in my heart.

But witnessing him leaving

I knew he wasn't going to come back

I don't know why he decided to be so distant from us.

I have dreams about him coming back and I cry,
knowing that its only a dream.

I feel like
he's afraid of wanting to know how I feel.

I just feel like he doesn't want me to be around him

Simply because his life is different
but I have loved him
all my life.

And even now I wish that he was here,
but he's broken my heart so many times,
without him knowing
that ive already given up.

I don't know what to feel anymore of him

I've tried already...

I want to face him,

I want to hear his voice,
but I'm so scared and...unprepared.